People read fiction for one thing above all else--emotion. They want to laugh, cry, get warm fuzzies, be surprised, be scared, be so scared they pee their pants! The problem is that too many times writers don't DELVE into their emotions. They say, "Clark was angry." or "Clara was excited." Well, so what? Those are just words. We can't FEEL it.
When it comes to emotions it's best to SHOW. It's also best to sometimes be over the top. If it's too much (which rarely happens) you can scale back.
It's also important to be creative. Help us to view these emotions in a new way. Here is an example from Anne Lamott.
"God, it was painful though, too, and the hangover was debilitating. I was deeply aware of the worm inside of me and of the grim bits that I feed it. The secret envy inside me is maybe the worst thing about my life. I am the Saddam Hussein of jealousy."
~Anne Lamott, Operating Instructions
That's less than 50 words, and even though this is non-fiction we can FEEL it. We can relate. We can understand.
So take time to go through your book. Highlight the emotions. Are you just telling? Delete that and rewrite it so we can FEEL it. Is it cliché? Think of a way to come up with something unique. Your reader will love you for it.
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